Adventure. Change. Freedom. Comfort. These are some of my values and I”m sure they seem conflicting when you notice the word. “comfort” thrown into the mix. The thing is, I don’t always do the change thing very well in my life. At times, I’m really tested by change. Throw me into a new situation and at first, I feel a little “off,” wondering where I am and if things will be okay. I’m dong my best to honor my human side lately. My human side wants comfort and to have some constancy in my life. It’s okay to need those things a little bit, I’d say.
I think it’s okay to have a little bit of comfort, especially when you’re not physically well. End of last month, I became really sick with an upper respiratory infection, probably the flu. It has taken about two weeks to completely go away. I’m still working on feeling better.
I really need hot beverages when I’m sick. I need a bed, blanket, book, and journal. Such small comforts, but for me, they mean the world. At times, some of my ways of bringing comfort into my life do not serve me well, such as always checking my Facebook for things such as private messages or my news feed for cool or inspiring things. I procrastinate way too much at times. So, I wonder if comfort isn’t always a good thing. It serves my ego at times, but not my soul.
Addictions show up in different forms for people. We’re just trying to do our best to bring comfort and homeostasis into our lives. I myself notice that when I get stressed out, I can’t eat, so comfort eating is not something I have to worry about luckily. I also rarely drink alcohol and well, I don’t do drugs or smoke cigarettes. On the other hand, I do like to zone out with digital fixes such as Etsy browsing, Amazon book browsing, blog reading, Facebook or email. I also can find a zillion and one things to do around the house, such as cleaning or organizing to lose myself in and avoid doing my important work (writing, art, music, yoga, meditation, and marketing). In the past, I bordered on addiction with my fitness stuff, racing my bicycle and training like a madwoman. I think, too, I used to be addicted to achievement and trying to be a success. I let go of the fitness and success addictions too. I do still really love a decaf espresso and I don’t plan on giving that up anytime soon.
In the past, I used to try to find comfort through being with other people. I’d sit and talk about my problems. I’d try to support the other people. I’m not sure if I was a good friend or not. Then, I noticed some of my friends leaving my life. I think that this happens naturally with relationships. It’s that whole “reason, season, or lifetime” cliche bit. It wasn’t until I reached my 40s that I found comfort more from art, music, writing, and following my callings, instead of trying to be comforted outside of myself by people. I guess some vestiges of this remain with some of the remaining aspects of my digital addictions that I’m working to heal.
One thing Buddhist teachers of mine talk about is how as humans we’re all trying to avoid suffering. It’s what we all have in common. We want to feel good and avoid pain. The past two years, I’ve noticed that my pain has really tried to get my attention. At times, I think it’s gone, but other times, I notice it’s still there, just a bit. The disappointment and heartache of not living up to your own expectations might seem insignificant or like “first world pain,” but when you’re going through the waves of emotion and processing through it, it’s very real.
As I’ve healed my post-publishing depression, I’ve looked closely at my habits each day to see where I’m avoiding myself or life or my emotions and feelings. I’ve tried to be compassionate towards myself the best I can. It’s been really hard for me. My health suffered and I had a relapse of chronic fatigue syndrome, which I’ve been working to heal since early 2013. I thought I was done with those lessons, having healed it in early 2000s.
Then, when I really started to feel better, it seemed like all of these critics came out of the woodwork. Some were kind enough to write me privately, ha ha. All of them were woman. Their main criticism of me and my work was that I seemed to be a “kept woman.” I’m paraphrasing and no, they didn’t use that term, but they basically suggested it. The thing is, my life and finances are no one’s business. Also, I’ve had massive health challenges over the years.
So what if I don’t work a traditional day job. I work for myself and it works for me and yes, I do make money and hell yes, I work hard…maybe a bit too hard. I’d like these critics to see my medical bills, many of which I’ve paid out of pocket because I use holistic treatments. While they’re typing away about how “privileged” I am, I can’t help but wonder how they don’t see themselves as having privilege too. They have a computer, a job, and can read and write, which not everyone in the world can say that they have. My British friend said to tell them to “bugger off,” ha ha ha! I should have, but I’m not wanting to be mean to others. I know what it’s like to be on the receiving end of that and I’d rather be kind…but, I have started to speak up for myself.
Zoning out is sometimes way easier. I don’t have to feel the hurt that others try to project onto me. I don’t have to feel the disappointments I’ve experienced from living on the planet and not living up to my own or others’ expectations for me. I don’t have to be disappointed when stuff goes awry.
What works for me is being gentle with myself in this process of returning to my true self. I’m not trying to live others’ dreams any more. I’m actually zoning out much less and working on some fun projects that I enjoy. I am working on enjoying and loving the moment as much as possible, even if I’m not a success on paper or according to what some in society dictate. It’s liberating and it “only” took me some 42 or more years to sort of get it.
What is comforting to me is knowing that I have so much to be grateful for, including my creativity, my connection to the divine, and my relatively good health. I feel comforted by nature, including friendly animals and birds. I love how the sun shines on my back and how the clouds look so yummy. I enjoy the rainbows and the rain. Good books are good friends, as are journals. I love to get messy with paint, Mod Podge, and glitter. I love sunsets, but there’s something so tranquil about the sunrise, being up before everyone else. Comfort can come from these so-called small things. I don’t need fame, fortune, or media placements. I’m so over all of that.
What brings you comfort? Are there addictions you need to release? Is there a way to be gentler and more kind with yourself? Share in the comments. I’d love to hear from you.
If you’re read my blog for a while, you know that I’m a big proponent of self-care. One of my favorite ways to take care of myself is to take power naps. I know that the experts will say to only do a 15-20 minute power nap so you don’t wake up feeling groggy. Well, it takes me that long to fall asleep, so mine tend to be 30 minutes long.
In college, I could nap anywhere. I was working part-time with a full class load. I would take naps in the graduate library study kiosks (some even had a door for privacy), along with the computing cluster. I used to take naps at half-time at football games since I was so tired. Nowadays, I prefer my futon. (Futon or couch naps work better for me than my bed. If I go into my bed, I will sleep for hours since it’s too comfortable.) Oh wait, I also should mention my ability to sleep in any moving vehicle. I somehow developed the skill of sleeping in the passenger seat quite comfortably.
I’m a really happy, laid back type of person, but when I’m tired, I get grumpy. Anyone who knows me well knows this about me. I don’t get grumpy towards you. I just find a way to take a quick nap and then, get on with the rest of my day.
My one confession about my naps is that I like to make productive use of the time by listening to a guided meditation. (Yes, I even like to make sure that my nap time is productive. I know, I am a Type A person.) Or, at times, if I only have 15-20 minutes, I’ll do a brief meditation on my own. I once read that 15 minutes of meditation time was equivalent to eight hours of sleep. I’m not so sure that I buy that 100% yet, but I keep trying. I keep putting it out there that I’ll awaken to feeling totally refreshed and relaxed. It seems to be working, but progress is slow.
When I’m working on a big project, I still like to make sure that I take care of myself by getting sleep, exercising, meditating, playing guitar, and getting some fresh air. I used to try the sleep deprivation, work-around-the-clock, and ingest as much caffeine as possible method. It doesn’t work. I end up getting exhausted. A few months ago, I lowered my caffeine intake substantially. I used to drink a full French press pot each day. Now, I have one cup of green tea each day. I’ve noticed that I sleep much better, almost like a rock (or like a bear, perhaps? I sure hope that I’m not snoring. Poor hubby.).
What about you? Do you ever take naps? Does napping help you? How do you alleviate your grumpiness? I’d love to hear your thoughts and ideas. Feel free to leave me a comment.
(Photo Credit: Paul Vallejo, Flickr, Creative Commons License)
I’m a big believer in self-care. Self-care simply means taking care of yourself. It’s not selfish. If you are rested and peaceful, you not only function better in the world, but you’re able to help others from a place of well-being and peace. When you take care of yourself, it’s easier to want to serve and help since you’re coming from a place of love, not resentment.
Okay, enough of my soap box. Self-care also is healthy. Stress is so rampant in modern times. Reduce your stress and you reduce the likelihood of many dis-eases and of course, the worst dis-ease of all–unhappiness.
I like to do self-care as a break from hard work. It feels good. I feel better. Life is good. Here are my favorite, top 5 methods of self-care:
1. Salt baths. I love to soak in the bath tub. I use sea salt in the bath water to help clear my energies. Sometimes, I add a few drops of essential oils. I intend when I take a bath to allow the water to clear away all negativity, stress, or whatever no longer serves me. It’s a necessity for me as a professional psychic, not a luxury, I always say. I love working with people, but it can be easy to pick up energies. Salt helps to neutralize the energies, clear the biofield and chakras, and ground you. Try it after a hectic day at work or after being in a large crowd of people.
2. Meditation. When in doubt, meditate. Sit down, close your eyes, and breathe. That’s it. You don’t need to sit fancy. You don’t need to stop your thoughts (you can’t). Just observe your body, mind, and spirit. Just see what happens. Try 5 minutes per day and then, work up to 10 or 15 minutes per day. I used to think if I meditated more, I’d become enlightened. Nope, living in Earth School is what gets you enlightened. It’s the way you handle the people and situations in your life that creates enlightenment. Meditation gives you the tools to handle whatever life throws at you, or whatever you create in your life–however you wanna look at it.
3. Retail Therapy. I’m not going to lie, I like to shop. I mean, I’m frugal and don’t always buy stuff. I also am not very materialistic, so I don’t like to acquire a lot of stuff. It’s just fun to sometimes look at things for inspiration. Although I’m a big fan of Urban Decay makeup and buying books and music, I find that sometimes, browsing around a thrift store brings joy to my heart. It’s fun to see all of the treasures, and once in a while, I find a retro party dress for $5. Fun, fun, fun.
4. Driving with the windows rolled down. Okay, this one is weather permitting. I also don’t advocate just driving to drive since I’m an environmentalist, but there is something delicious about driving with the fresh air. I love it at night, especially with music playing. Since I don’t have a motorcycle, this will just have to do for now.
5. Exercise. Working out is my salvation. It keeps me sane. If I had to pick a religion (ha ha ha!), I’d pick exercise. It always works. I feel more so much better when I work out. It reduces my stress and anxiety. It helps me to fit into a size 4, yadda, yadda, yadda. I don’t have to convince you since it’s something you just have to do in order to understand the benefits.
Now, your turn! What are your favorite methods of self-care? I’d love to hear your ideas and thoughts on this. Feel free to share here!
Feeling stuck sucks. It’s not a very good feeling at all. Instead, I’d like to invite you to think of moving forward. (Yeah, I admit to writing the title to get your attention a bit. A more positive title would read: “7 Ways to Quickly Move Forward!”)
The following suggestions are for when you’re having an occasional blah day. Or, you really need to get to work. Although I’m a big believer in self-care, rest, and contemplation, sometimes, it’s a necessity to get off the couch. (These suggestions don’t really work well if you’ve been chronically ill, depressed, or stressed for a long period of time, by the way. You might need to get professional help from the appropriate professional for your situation.)
Okay, now that I have the disclaimers done, here are the 7 Ways to Quickly Get Unstuck:
1) Get physical. Get your body moving. Take a walk. Dance to a song or two. Go to the gym. Do some jumping jacks. The ego dislikes physical movement. When you move, your ego has to shut up. Your mind will go into the present moment. You’ll create some energy for yourself, along with some feel-good-chemicals. Return to your project or life after some movement and you’ll notice that things feel differently. Life doesn’t seem so serious. Creative ideas will be more accessible.
2) Go some place new. Take a drive to a new store. Go to a park where you haven’t been before. Walk or drive a different route. Routine will make energies feel stuck or stagnant. New places are inspiring since there are different sites, sounds, tastes, textures, and feelings. When you return to where you started, you will notice the little things in your environment that you hadn’t before, perhaps.
3) Have a tantrum. Get out your frustrations. Of course, don’t hurt yourself or anyone else. Pound on or yell into some pillows. Before you have your tantrum, set a timer for 5 minutes maximum. You don’t want to dwell in this much longer than that. When you’re done, just take some deep breaths. Get a drink of water. Think about what you’d rather experience than frustration. Maybe you just want to feel calm or un-rushed on your morning commute. Think about something small or easy. Note if you feel any better in the coming hours and next couple of days. If you don’t feel better, start a journal or talk to a friend, counselor, or loved one.
4) Sing. Find a fun song and just belt it out. Don’t critique yourself. This is for fun. Let the oxygen come into your being. Let yourself enjoy the freedom you experienced as a child. Children sing without worrying what others think. Return to your project, work, and life with a smile on your face. Singing raises up your energetic vibration (raises your vibes). I proudly sing Iron Maiden as I drive home most days, I’ll admit.
5) Go to a toy store. Play with the toys. If you don’t have kids, don’t pretend that you are shopping for a gift. Just enjoy the toys. In college, I would go to a local toy store on campus for a break when working on research papers. I’d always come back with new ideas and was able to overcome writers’ block easily. Children’s toys are designed for simplicity and fun. If life gets too difficult, try seeing it from the eyes of a child. Usually, the easiest solution is the best for most adult problems.
6) Do a random act of kindness for another. Open a door for someone. Give someone a compliment. Smile at someone. Donate a book to the library. Leave a dollar bill for someone to find. Being of service is the quickest way to silence the ego, even when done in so-called small ways. You will feel so good doing something for someone that you’ll forget why you were stuck. Try it. It works!
7) Declutter. Clean out a drawer. Organize your desk. Delete old emails. Clean out your purse or wallet. Do this for about an hour or so. Return to your work, project, or life feeling lighter, less weighed down, and more free. In Feng Shui, clutter is stagnant energy. It can make you feel congested on many levels or just stuck. Try donating 10 thins per week for a month. See what new energy comes in for you and your life.
Try these out next time you feel stuck. Let me know how it goes. Do you do any of these now? What advice do you have for people who feel stuck? I’d love to hear your thoughts and ideas too–so, feel free to share here.
I’ve consciously been working on my personal healing for quite some time. Gosh, come to think of it, it’s been since I was around 17 or 18 years. So, it’s been over 20 years of growth work, including me consulting with healers from time to time when I get stuck.
Towards the end of last year, I consulted with a medical intuitive for a reading. I just wondered what was going on not only physically, but also on other levels. I was feeling like having more understanding about how to shift old patterns. The session was pretty profound. Of course, the pricing was way out of my comfort zone, but it was money well spent. I learned a lot about why I have certain physical health conditions. I knew some of it, but the medical intuitive went to a deeper level with it all. And, in some cases, she pointed out the obvious.
As the intuitive read my energy, she went straight to talking about my root chakra. The root chakra also is called the first chakra (it’s the color red). (A chakra is an energy center, a biologic oscillator of sorts that powers your endocrine glands with correlations to other life areas such as the mental, emotional, and spiritual aspects, besides the physical.) The root chakra is about safety, security, and feeling a sense of belonging. One of the areas of the physical body that corresponds to the root chakra is the adrenal glands (they sit atop of your kidneys; think of the chakras corresponding to nerve plexi in the body, so sometimes, the corresponding organs are a bit distal from the chakra). To keep it simple, the adrenal glands serve an important function in the body by releasing hormones during stress. If you are too stressed, it’s possible to burn out your adrenal glands. You’ll end up being pretty tired. (The traditional, allopathic medical field doesn’t really acknowledge this idea of adrenal burnout, by the way.)
As the medical intuitive talked to me about my root chakra issues, I felt a bit of relief. I’ve healed adrenal fatigue before, and I knew what supplements to take and what lifestyle changes to make. I felt in the clear until she mentioned two things. She said we had to look at other areas of my energy. (Okay, it was a one hour reading, and I knew more would be coming.) Then, she said to help to heal my root chakra stuff, I’d need to find a group to join. A sense of belonging helps you to feel safe, secure, and loved. It apparently makes your root chakra quite happy.
The rest of the reading was just as profound. The other homework was doable. I could meditate and rest. I could do that stuff. I’m a hermit, after all. (Yeah, I did have monastic past lives. Luckily, we didn’t waste my session talking about those!) I’m also energy sensitive. I prefer my own company to being in large groups. Even if I shield my energy, I get exhausted in large groups. So, towards the end of the reading, I asked if on-line groups counted. Oh, man, I was put in my place (lovingly at least). She said it only counted if I found an in-person group.
I felt scared of finding a group. What if people didn’t like me. And, worse yet, she mentioned a class that I could take to help me feel supported in my goal of writing a book on a big ass boat in the middle of the ocean. I took that class and lived to tell about it. Yet, I still haven’t found an official group to belong to in an in-person, regular basis type of way.
For a while, I shopped on the website Meetup.com. I joined some to check out the energy and people, but for some reason, most of the ones I subscribed to went under. They are no longer meeting. The knitters disbanded (or is it “unraveled”?). The women’s networking groups I was in closed. I was kicked out of one or two groups for not attending a meeting (well, excuse me for having to visit a family member in the hospital that month!). Writing groups asked me for 6,000 word writing samples to even be considered to be a part of their group. I asked if I could send the link to this blog. I was refused entry since they were looking for “serious writers” only.
It’s funny actually to write all of that. I was afraid of rejection, and so, of course, this is what I received in return. So, instead, I thought I’d create more of a social life for myself. I’m a social butterfly on-line, so I started to try to get together with friends in-person locally. Again, this seems to fall through for me. I’ve learned to let go and just enjoy life as much as I can. Hubby and I love being together. And, well, I have squirrel and bird friends too.
The other day as I drove to my guitar lesson, I had a brilliant (to me) thought. I realized I was a part of a group. I am a musician, part of many who receive guitar lessons at the shop. This counts to me.
Slowly, I’m rebuilding my life after the most stressful three years of my life. Although my finances have healed considerably the past year, there was a time when due to budget, I couldn’t have a social life, aside from coffee with a friend. When you go through hard times, you do find out who your true friends really are, I’ll say that. I’ve had a major shift in friends. It’s all good.
Usually, I can accomplish any assignment that a healer or coach gives me. But, so far, I feel like I have not really done the homework of finding a group so well, at least not on the healer’s terms. This is okay though. I know all is in divine order. The right people and groups will be in my life soon.
My question to the medical intuitive now is, “Does being in a band count?”
That gives you a hint about the next chapter of my life. Stay tuned.
Forgiveness is a beautiful thing. It is something that you do more to set yourself free. It’s something that you do for yourself and your own healing really.
Forgiveness might have a charge for you. You might be asking these types of questions in your mind:
“If I forgive, doesn’t it say that what the other person did is okay or right?” (It doesn’t condone the behavior or words of the other person to forgive him or her. By forgiving, you are simply letting go of the hurt, worry, disappointment, or other negative emotions. It’s a refusal to allow it to occupy valuable real estate in your being.)
“If I forgive, doesn’t it say that I’m a pushover?” (Not really. By forgiving a person, you actually show how strong you are. You demonstrate that you see their potential. You show the qualities of higher love, being able to accept and love the dark and light sides of a person. This will impact them to reconsider their character, behaviors, habits, and their destiny, even in unconscious or subconscious ways.)
“If I forgive, do I really have to go tell the person that they are forgiven?” (No, you don’t. You can do forgiveness at a distance. You can telepathically tell the person, living or deceased that you forgive them. Even if he or she doesn’t hear or see you, he or she will feel the energy of the love as you forgive. You might even notice something interesting happening after you forgive. You might receive a loving letter or phone call from the person. If the person is in the spirit realms, you might get a shout out from him or her such as hearing a song you enjoyed together on the radio or perhaps, someone living buys you some flowers that were your deceased loved ones’ favorite while they were alive.)
Forgiveness used to really challenge me. At times, I would forgive too easily or too infrequently. The most frustrating thing for me was when others’ patterns would repeat. I would feel not only the current wounds, but all of the wounds of the past, in the moment at hand. It felt enormous like my heart would burst open from the pain. Later in my late 30’s, I learned how to manage my sensitivity better. I now see the actions and hurtful things separate from the person. I know in my heart that the loved one is good inside. That has helped me quite a bit to have this perspective.
Are some things unforgivable? Sure, but as they say, time heals all wounds. I can’t write about some of the hurts I’ve endured publicly yet. I’m not ready to share. However, I can say that I’ve done a lot of work on healing these hurts and learned quite a bit about myself and love in the process. One thing I’ve learned is that it’s okay to experience all of the human emotions. Let yourself get angry, mad, sad, cry, stomp, punch pillows, yell, etc. Be safe about it, of course. Take care of you by journaling, talking to a loved one, getting some counseling or healing work, or extra rest. Try not to do self-destructive things. You know what those are and I don’t even have to list them, right?
When you are ready, you will know when it’s time to forgive. It is a process that can’t be rushed. It’s like the photo here of the pretty rose. You can’t rush roses. They bloom in their own time, after proper nourishment, water, and sunlight. But, look at how gorgeous they are once they bloom. It’s all done in perfect timing.
Other people, especially those we love the most, are our greatest teachers when it comes to forgiveness. They usually bring up our unfinished business to sort out. They also mirror the aspects of ourselves that we haven’t learned to love as of yet. Some people spend tons of time, effort, and money studying with spiritual teachers, often traveling to the far reaches of the world. Yet, sometimes, you might be living at home with your best guru. That guru can be your spouse, your kids, or your parent(s). The ones that get on your nerves the most, yes, these are the best teachers you have. The ones that make you cry or yell the most are again, your best teachers. (Of course, if you are being abused in any way, please, take care of you. All of the love and forgiveness in the world is not going to stop an abuser. So, stop right now and give yourself that love and get out of that situation. Don’t be hard on yourself that you’ve stayed so long. You’re human and tried your best.)
I’m curious to know about your experiences with forgiveness. What have you learned about it? What was the most challenging part? I’d love to hear from you! Feel free to share here.
(Photo credit: by dw33by, Flickr, Creative Commons License)
Yesterday, I went for a walk after doing my Blogtalkradio show. The show was Psychic Messages for June 2011. One of the messages that came through was to take care of yourself with some rest and rejuvenation. Well, after I came back from my walk, I felt exhausted with a sore throat. I rarely ever get sick. If you remember my other blog posts, you’ll know that the last time I found myself ill was in December 2010. Prior to that, it had been 3 years since I had any type of illness!
I made an appointment with my couch this morning. I decided that it wasn’t helpful for me to keep on pushing myself. Even though I was not feeling well yesterday, I still made myself do a workout later in the day. I also protested hubby wanting to make dinner for us. I still did laundry. Oh, gosh, when will I ever learn?
I need to learn this lesson about self-care. Messages about self-care come through all of the time for my clients. I am the type of psychic and person that likes to walk her talk. Mostly, I find that I’m able to walk my talk in other situations. If a message comes through for a client to be more authentic or to stop procrastinating, for example, I will seriously look at myself, including the areas in which I need to do the same. However, when it comes to self-care, I don’t always find that I walk my talk 100%. I push myself hard. Now, my body is giving me messages that I can’t do that any longer. I wanna stop having to learn this lesson in such unpleasant ways, you know?
I laugh ’cause of my own stubbornness and shall I say, stupidity? I’m supposed to take it easy today, but yet, I’m writing a blog post, along with doing other marketing. Ha ha ha! Yeah, I need to stop and honor that appointment that I made with my couch. So, I’m cutting this one short here. Time to rest, read, journal, and drink plenty of fluids.
Have you ever just felt “blah”? I know that one of my most recent posts is about having a case of the Mondays. I apologize in advance for being negative. I can’t always be a beacon of hope, you know?
Although I don’t believe that creative energy is finite, sometimes, it sure feels like it. Lately, I just feel that my creativity has been drained. I once read a spiritual teacher or someone equally wise say that creativity is life force energy since the Universe creates constantly. So, maybe my issue is that I have a depletion of life force energy?
You might be wondering why I’m so blah-like. I guess it’s because I’m tired from putting my heart and soul into a project that I’ve been working on since early February of this year. In fact, I feel like I’ve spilled my heart and soul all over it. It’s time for me to replenish myself.
I smile as I look at this naked post. It doesn’t even have a photo. I don’t have the energy to find a suitable one as I usually do for my blog posts.
I mainly wrote this post so that you would not feel so alone. I know that some of you have written me asking about how to get your mojo back. Some of you feel challenged by life in general, especially when it comes to having an uninspiring job. Or, you might feel that your dreams are so far out of reach. Did you know that it’s okay to feel like this from time to time? If you are feeling “blah” most or all of the time, however, you might want to get some support as in talking to a loved one, counselor, physician (some health conditions can cause depression), or the like.
But, let’s say that your Blah Feelings are a temporary thing. Do you ever wonder how you can make the best of the Blah’s? Here’s some guidance for you coming from someone who truly understands:
1. Get physical. When you’re stuck in ego, it can be very helpful to get out of your head. The ego doesn’t like it when you go for walks or exercise. Physical activity clears the mind and heart of negativity. Get outside, if possible. Fresh air will help you to gain perspective. Put on some music and shake your booty. This will loosen up your energy field’s debris, clearing the way for inner peace.
2. Bitch and Moan. Complain to a trusted friend who will just listen without trying to fix you. Bitch and moan in your journal. But, set a time limit on it. Don’t dwell there. Give yourself 1-2 hours or 8 hours maximum to get the bitching and moaning out of your system.
3. Do something nice for another. Be of service to someone, even if you just simply open a door for him or her. Surprise your friend, family member, or significant other with a small gift. Do one small thing to make another person’s life easier and more joyful. This will open your heart and the blah’s will soon be gone. Don’t knock it until you try it.
4. Laugh. Find a funny video on YouTube or elsewhere that will make you laugh. Then, repeat this over and over until you feel better. Laughter, as they say, is good medicine. It might feel fake at first, but soon, you will find it becomes genuine fun and joy. Read on-line about studies that show the healing power of laughter. You just might buy into it.
5. Be ridiculous. Write a country song or poem about your blah’s. Write really silly or bad lyrics or lines. Write a kids’ book about your current life story. Be dramatic with your word choice. Then, dispose of it. Flush it down the toilet or burn it (safely, of course!). Then, laugh at yourself. Embrace your humanity in all of its glory.
6. Shred. Pick up a guitar. Get on a mountain bike. Get out a garbage bag and go to town on weeding out your old paperwork. Release the frustration in a safe, fun way. Let your inner child out. Run wild in a park. Roll down the windows in your car, singing on the top of your lungs to a song on your stereo.
7. Get some love. Get or give a hug. Have someone hold you. Have hot sex. Watch small animals play in a park. Feel the healing energies of Mother Earth. Eat some chocolate. Get a massage session or a pedicure. Take a healing bath. Love yourself as much as you love others.
So, this is my list of how to make the best of the blah’s. I hope you find it helpful in some way.
What do you do when you have a case of the blah’s? What works for you to get out of your ego? Feel free to share here. I’d love to hear your ideas!
I am having a case of the Mondays. Yes, I want the weekend to be here already. I know this is not the most positive mindset to start the week with, but I still feel it. I just think that the weekends are more fun, you know?
I am blessed because I don’t have to go to a traditional, 9-5 type of job during the week. However, my husband does that. So, I sometimes don’t feel like we can have fun together until the weekend arrives. But, honestly, we do our best to have fun during the week. There’s just not a lot of time, so we do small things to make each other smile.
I’m amazed at hubby’s dedication to his job. He’s there about 12-14 hours per day. I don’t think I could ever do that.
I recently changed my talk radio show to be on Monday mornings. I thought this would help me to start the week on a positive note. Some of that has helped me a bit.
Really, I know that I should be excited. Monday means the start of another week. But, what is it about Mondays that is so annoying?
I tend to do most of my work Mondays through Thursdays. I prefer to have my Fridays be more flexible. So, I know that I can change this and lighten things up, but I don’t want to have what resembles a 9-5 day job, you know?
But, I get tired from working so hard. I’ve been learning to let myself get more rest. I recently realized that I was getting up at the crack of dawn because I thought I had to do that so people, especially my hubby wouldn’t think I was lazy. Yes, I’m so lame. I still worry about what people think of me at times. Well, more me worrying about what hubby thinks since he’s more important than other people to me
I thought about the ridiculousness of it all. Getting up early for no good reason. My commute is about 20 feet away. I would get up at 7:00 a.m. most days. Sometimes, I can get up that early, but other times, I need to sleep in until 8:00 a.m. or 9:00 a.m. I’m the type of person who can’t get by on 5-6 hours of sleep per night. I need 8-9 hours of sleep to feel my best.
I have a history of chronic fatigue syndrome, so I really need to honor my body, more so than most people. Yet, some people can be so judgmental. “Oh, you get to sleep in since you don’t have a real job.” Whatever. They are just jealous, right?
I am just going to honor my case of the Mondays today. I put on some music to write to and work to, so I feel better. I’m just going to pace myself. Yes, the house needs cleaned. I need to get groceries. It can wait. I need to finish up my book proposal–this is my priority, along with being rested. It’s very difficult to focus and concentrate when you’re tired, let alone find creative inspiration.
So, I’m going to take it easy on myself. I’m going to be gentle with myself. I scheduled a massage for tonight. Time to relax and go with the flow, at least in the way I know how to. Ha ha ha! I suck at relaxing, to be honest.
Do you ever have a case of the Mondays? How do you handle it? What advice would you give to others? Feel free to share here.
I relate to this song. I have a some hermit characteristics. My life path number is a 9 (it corresponds to the Hermit in the traditional tarot). I also enjoy the balance of having a social life though, so I do venture out of the house to see live music, go shopping, spend time in nature, and spend time with family and friends. The thing is that I often need time alone to counterbalance the time with others or outside of the confines of my home. I also enjoy being my own best friend. I never let myself down, you know?
I’m also a pretty sensitive person. I’m sensitive to energies. I have read in books that I’m an emotional empath. This means that I am affected or drained by being in the energy fields of others. Large crowds deplete me. I will feel tired even after eating at a restaurant, especially if people are loud. (On a side note: I can’t believe how loud some people are in restaurants! Do you really have to shout or talk on your phone in public? I digress…)
I’ve learned to manage my energies better after years of studies in metaphysics and energy work. You might be wondering as you read this if I’ve ever used grounding and shielding methods. You might wonder if I’ve saged or taken salt baths to clear my energy? Well, yes, I’ve done all of these things. I’ve done pretty much everything from A-Z when it comes to energy management. Yet, I still have times when I get tired, drained, or overwhelmed.
I laugh when people say that sensitivity is a gift. I relate to that a bit, but I have known so many gifted, talented, but sensitive artistic and creative people. We talk about how it’s our sensitivity that helps us get into touch with our creative sides. I’m not so sure any more about that gift aspect of it.
In some cases, sensitive, creative people turn to substances to deal with energies. Some people really judge Johnny Thunders (who the song here is written by) for being a heroin addict. Addictions are a way to self-medicate. It’s a way to cope with the stress of life. Anything can be an addiction if it’s not serving you. You can be addicted to a person or people (co-dependence). You can be addicted to legal stuff like work, food, the internet, shopping, bingo, gambling, porn, caffeine, and the like. Everyone is just trying to do the best that they can at any given moment, so no judgment from me about addictions.
I like to be all by myself at times. Other times, I feel like it would be nice to be around others, but I am tired, so I don’t. I have found navigating through friendships as an adult to be very challenging at times (a topic for another blog post). I tend to screen my phone calls. I tend to prefer email as a form of communication. I like to shop at stores during the week when they are less busy. I wear a lot of crystal jewelry as a buffer. I meditate and just do the best I can to take care of myself.
I smile when people say that they wished they were psychic like me. First off, I want you to be psychic like YOU, not me. Your psychic skills will work differently than mine. Secondly, do you really want to be so sensitive and tuned into people’s emotions? It’s a lot to manage. I don’t always do the best at managing it. Perhaps, I should not have picked this as a career. (Really, it picked me.) I’m not saying you can’t handle it, but just asking you to think. Thinking is a good thing.
Do you relate at all to being sensitive or to being an emotional empath? How do you manage your own energy? Feel free to share here.